Don’t Nobody Wanna Hear That!

There’s a loooong list of words that trigger us! Last week I learned that the word RELAX triggers people immediately! Even if you say relax with kindness people will interpret that as an attack on their character, even if they do need to chill out!

On this blog I wanted to talk about a perspective on life that’s not very popular. This concept is a HARD pill for people to swallow and I swear I was TRIGGERED when I learned about this concept. I mean I was internally pissed for weeks!

Are you ready for this grand epiphany in life!? The concept is….”YOU ARE THE PROBLEM!” Whhhhhaaaat!!!!??? I know, I know “Chenea, you need to relax!” (Haha!) I know it’s a hard thing that no one wants to hear but it is the most honest thing that anyone could tell you.

There was this point in my life where I was blaming everyone and everything outside of myself for my depression and why I wasn’t were I wanted to be in my life. It was my parents fault that I was unhappy, it was societies fault that I couldn’t do the things that I wanted to doin my life, the economy sucks so there’s no opportunities for me, people suck that’s why I’m lonely, the list goes on and on! It was so bad that I kept myself up at night thinking about all the ways life sucked and my relationships sucked.

The first self help book I ever picked up was The Power of Now by Eckart Toll. If you want to know more check out my book review blog here. That book really shifted my perspective on life. I had to understand that I was in the this dark place because of how I was choosing to look at my situation. I had to realize that I was in this dark place because of me and if I wanted to pull myself out of this hopelessness I was the one that needed to make some changes.

So here is the call to action….the really hard part. Can you look at a situation in your life that you are unhappy with whether it is love, your career, or money etc. Really look at it and think about what you can do to fix it. Don’t be afraid to ask people that are close to you what is wrong with you. Odds are if they love you, they are going to give it to you straight. It’s okay to be mad that’s natural, but you shouldn’t completely dismiss what they are saying, really listen and think about what they are saying. Odds are it’s something you knew you needed to change a long time ago, you just thought no one saw your mess!

It’s so easy to blame other people for your downfalls. It’s harder to look at yourself as the cause for all your life drama. It is all more rewarding! When I started taking accountability for myself I started to feel better, my confidence grew, and I began to take steps towards making changes in my life!

What are some of the big changes that you made in your life? I would love you read your stories in the comments below! Don’t forget to follow me on Instagram @afrosandcondos! I’m always working!!


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